Tag: mindful leadership

Having one of these days?

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Heart MeditationWhile working and feeling a bit overwhelmed today with all sorts of things happening and different emotions passing by at the same time, suddenly a mail popped up in my inbox. I get quite a lot of newsletters and blog entries on a daily basis, hence am not reading them directly normally. This one though, caught my attention as the first line that I saw read the following:

“Recognize that you are feeling disturbed, overwhelmed, depressed or some other depleting or negative emotion”.

I thought, oh, yes, ok… I acknowledge that I am feeling kind of disturbed today, maybe I should do something against that and simply send some kindness to myself instead of judging and ruminating.

So I continued reading the newsletter and immediately felt better after some moments of stillness. As we all have our good and less good days, I wanted to share this little exercise with all of you. It is called “Soft Heart Tool” and comes from heartmath.org. Hopefully it will help you too!

  1. Recognize that you are feeling disturbed, overwhelmed, depressed or some other depleting or negative emotion.
  2. Acknowledge that it is not these or other emotions that cause you to feel drained or out of sorts as much as it is the significance you give them.
  3. Find your Soft Heart attitude by intentionally feeling love, care or appreciation for a person, pet or something you truly care about. This helps take you to a soft place in your heart and increases your ability to feel care and compassion for yourself.
  4. Soak and relax any unwanted feelings in the compassion of your heart, letting the significance dissolve a little at a time. Take your time.

Jenny

 

 

The battle with our Selves

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The journey towards our SelvesIn their book “Leading from the emerging future”, Otto Scharmer and Katrin Kaufer state the following:

“The primary battlefield of this century is with our Selves. It is a battle between the self and the Self: between our existing habituated self and our emerging future Self, both individually and collectively.”

According to their research and findings, the battle takes place between what they call absencing and presencing, meaning on one hand the downloading and replicating of habitual behaviours, holding onto the past and not opening our minds, hearts and will, thus being on autopilot; and on the other hand the heightened awareness, openness, letting go of the old and embracing/embodying the new to become more creative again.

To be honest, I for myself am in the middle of this battle currently… downloading and pretending not to listen to my gut feeling is simple, the “let us do as we always did, it’s so much easier” voice in my heat all too present. Very strongly though, I feel that this route is not for me, that there is something else to explore and some fantastic opportunities around the corner waiting to be seized and explored. Although it seems to be easy, letting go and swimming against what is known and what everybody does requires courage, discipline and a lot of mindfulness.

Have you also experienced moments of disruptions in your life? How did you react to these, did you switch on your autopilot or did you respond in a new, more creative way?

As we deal with the complexity of the 21st century, we need to change the way things are done, also the way leadership is approached. This change definitely starts with our Selves!

Have an excellent weekend,

Jenny

The art of connecting to your audiences

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self-leadership

Last week, I gave you some theory and hints from speech and communication studies, that would help you navigate through the process of preparing what you will say when preparing a presentation; as promised, this week, I will introduce you to a mindful way to present and speak.

Let me begin with a quote from Artur Schnabel, an Austrian classical pianist 1882-1952:

“The notes I handle no better than many pianists. But the pauses between the notes–ah, that is where the art resides!”

Did you know that in the act of presenting, speaking publicly, teaching etc., there is significantly more occurring than the presentation and/or exchange of conceptual information? Behind and alongside the conceptual information we give out, a large body of non-verbal and paraverbal (tone of voice, how we say things) information is being exchanged.

Many of these processes are happening unconsciously, meaning that people involved don’t immediately notice that they are affected.

Example: You certainly know the feeling when you meet somebody for the first time and you somehow sense that you are not feeling comfortable.

Scientifically we would speak of:

Emotional Contagion:

Unconsciously mimicking the facial expressions, vocal expressions, postures, and instrumental behaviors of those around us, and thereby “catching” others’ emotions as a consequence of such facial, vocal, and postural mimicking.

And

Mirror Neurons:

A small circuit of cells in the premotor cortex and inferior parietal cortex which are activated both when we perform a certain action and when we observe someone else performing that same action. In other words, they collapse the distinction between seeing and doing.

Examples: You are watching a race, and you feel your own heart racing with excitement as the runners vie to cross the finish line first. Or you see a woman sniff some unfamiliar food and wrinkle her nose in disgust. Suddenly, your own stomach turns at the thought of the meal.

Thus: if you can manage to facilitate a field of belonging for your audience by connecting to them, you bring out the best in them and the best in yourself!

The trick is to learn to be with a group of any size one person at a time by connecting to your listener, allowing yourself to pause between sentences, breathe between thoughts and come to a full stop after big ideas.

You are in fact not screening your audience from left to right etc. as many people do but focusing on one person you feel is receptive to you, only some moments, and then move on to the next etc. Your audience will feel engaged and touched by what you have to say as you engage with them PERSONALLY.

Does this sound interesting and intriguing to you? Contact me to find out more and start to connect with your audiences in a mindful way TODAY!

Enjoy your summer (at least in this hemisphere) and hopefully some time off!

Jenny

Sitting in Silence

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Tomorrow I will be giving myself a vacation. I will simply go offline and BE. How wonderful is that? No more thinking, no more running just three days sitting in silence and listening, mindfully to my body, my emotions, my breath.
Here’s sending you positive thoughts for the weekend ahead!

Next week I will be at Caux attending Initiative of Change’s international TIGE (trust and integrity in the global economy) conference. Stay tuned for great insights and more on mindful leadership!
Jenny

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Mindful Leadership and VUCA

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Climbing manDo you know what VUCA means? No? Well, not so long ago, I didn’t either, rest assured!

Apparently, as Dan Goleman puts it: “The only certainty about tomorrow’s business reality is that it will be “VUCA”: volatile, uncertain, complex and ambiguous. As the world changes, so do the abilities leaders will need. Yet there is a specific skill set that will match the demands of such a reality.”

The common usage of the term “VUCA” already began in the 1990s and derives from military vocabulary. Subsequently, it has turned into a corporate buzzword used in strategic leadership and elsewhere.

One thing is for sure though: leaders need some sort of tools and training to counteract the effects of 24/7 connectivity, multitasking and information overload!

Excellent leadership is not only a win for an organization but also a win for employees and for the community as a whole. As our actions (positive and negative) as a leader affect others, being mindful about how we lead should be the way forward.

According Janice Marturano in her book “Finding the space to lead”, Mindful Leadership is:

  1. The ability to connect (to self and others) and also to the community (being able to see the bigger picture and not to get caught up by one single objective)
  2. The ability to skillfully initiate or guide change:
  • By collaborating and listening
  • With open curiosity and with the
  • Willingness to live within ambiguity until a decision becomes clear.

Are you ready to embrace the business reality of the 21st century? Let me know if I can help you develop the skills to simply accept VUCA and take it as an opportunity rather than a threat!

Jenny

For a good start into the weekend!

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Mountain

 

“A human being … experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings, as something separate from the rest–a kind of optical illusion of consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening the circle of understanding and compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.” – Albert Einstein

 

Are you able to let go of your fears?

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Self Leadership

I just watched an extremely powerful TEDx San Diego talk of Koelle Simpson, the horse whisperer… amazing how she describes her work with horses and draws the parallel to empathy, compassion and mindful leadership. I always heard that learning and working with horses can be a great experience but this talk really brings it to the point: by letting go of your own fears and by simply listening to your intuition and being yourself, people around you will start mirroring what you are doing and and how you are behaving because this is how we are build, neurologically speaking. You always hear “walk the talk” but this TEDx talk, powerfully shows, how true this actually is… Enjoy watching and let me know how you felt!

Jenny

Reality versus Perception: Our Brain at Work

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Map

Lately I came across a very nice quote referring to the differences that exist between beliefs and reality:

“The map is not the territory” from Alfred Korzybski

This quote illustrates very nicely that your reality (what you believe is true and objective, thus your ‘world’), is nothing else than an inner representation of the external realities and the world that you are observing and living in. Your perceptions create the “map of the world”. This map helps you navigate in the “real world”, through daily experiences and impressions. Like a road map it gives you landmarks for moving forward towards your destination and various codes and rules let you interpret and understand what is happening, what you can do and what you cannot.

Thus, there is “your” reality (the map) and the outside world (the territory) and there will always be differences between the two. Our human brain notices what is happening around us (in the territory) through our senses and then proceeds to filtering the received information in order to be able to use them and not to create an ‘overflow’ of stimuli.

Let me give you an example: Imagine your manager comes in and sees you sitting at your desk which is overflowing with paper and other things. He or she simply says: “You have a full desk”. Depending on your background, education, culture, previous experiences etc. you might be thinking: “Oh, he/she said that I am not organized”; or you might think something like “Oh, he/she notices that I have a lot on my plate” or anything in between. There are many different ways of interpreting what has been said and whatever you might have understood will trigger your reactions and your thoughts after that. Somebody observing the scene on the other hand, might interpret something completely different as he/she would have a very different view on the world. So, what is “real” and what not?

As you can see, there is only one situation happened: one territory. The possible representation hereof (the maps) however, i.e. how people perceive this situation can have many different facets and aspects.

Next time you find yourself in a difficult situation, you might want to think about what “really” happened (the facts) and what your interpretation, your judgment and your subjective view of the event was. You might even want to seek clarification from the person involved in the action clearly asking what was meant (if at all possible). The important thing to remember here is that you choose how you react and if at all… opening up to what really happened and what you saw, heard, felt, might help you change your behavior over time, which will in turn change the way others react upon you.

Thanks for reading! Jenny

Words are Windows or They’re Walls

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Window and Wall

I feel so sentenced by your words, I feel so judged and sent away, Before I go I’ve got to know,
Is that what you mean to say?

Before I rise to my defense, Before I speak in hurt or fear, Before I build that wall of words, Tell me, did I really hear?

Words are windows, or they’re walls, They sentence us, or set us free. When I speak and when I hear,
Let the love light shine through me.

There are things I need to say, Things that mean so much to me, If my words don’t make me clear, Will you help me to be free?

If I seemed to put you down,
If you felt I didn’t care,
Try to listen through my words, To the feelings that we share.

 

By Ruth Bebermeyer taken from Marshall Rosenberg’s book: Nonviolent Communication, 2nd Edition, page 20.