Category: Communication

Basic thoughts on communication

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Binary world

Communicating in today’s environment is not easy; not only are we constantly ‘followed’ by technical devices asking for an immediate response, a mail or a call but as the global world suddenly sits with us in our living rooms and offices, intercultural exchange and dialogue has become so ‘natural’ that we tend to forget its rules. Having to juggle with so many priorities at the same time, we respond, in the best possible manner without thinking too much as our mind is already preoccupied with the next task. So it then happens, that suddenly a message that was intended as a collection of feedback – no more and no less – to be discussed on the phone at a later stage creates a reaction at the other end of the world where it was sent, which was not foreseeable by any means and not stoppable as rumors already started to spread… well, a tsumami of mails and a couple of strange feelings later we come to a point where we ask ourselves these questions: WHAT HAPPENED HERE? And: COULD THIS HAVE BEEN AVOIDED?

The answer clearly is: yes! As even though people all speak English and we are all ‘one family’ speaking virtually together at any time of the day: before sending out a message or a communication, the ramifications should be thought of. No time doesn’t mean no mindful e-mailing! Well, let’s print this out and put it up on a prominent place so that it can be seen… taking the time to think things through actually saves you time that you need to spend afterwards to repair the broken vase after the fact! Have an excellent evening, morning, day, Jenny

What it takes to lead multicultural teams

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earth

Today I want to write a short note about leadership in international teams as I get a lot of questions about what is important, what works and what not.

Well, one thing is for sure: leading teams composed of members from the whole world is certainly a lot of fun but also takes a lot of effort so that it can function in the right way, meaning that team members can realise their full potential and don’t feel threatened, not understood or unwell.

In a multicultural team it is very important that different opinions, views, understandings are always:

  • addressed,
  • explained and
  • understood.

By operating that way, you ensure that problems are discussed directly when they arise, so that no frictions – in the worst case leading to dysfunctional teams – can arise. What you are trying to do is to achieve the best possible synergies, not the adaptation of some individuals to the ideas and concepts of the others (this would create an asymmetric team dynamic) or even the resistance of some team members to the perceptions of the others which can lead to team members wanting to leave the team).

As all the team members are from different cultural backgrounds, they will all have different values and norms. By discussing these and finding synergies, you will create an atmosphere of convergence and trust, where all team members will make an effort to find a common ground of understanding. This in turn forms the basis on which you and your team can work together… and achieve your objectives, of course.

Don’t expect the basis you created to be there forever though! It has to be re-negotiated every time when a new issue arises as what is acceptable to one person doesn’t have to be acceptable for the other. A good and functioning international team relies on constant discussions, give and takes as well as on working out the synergies to balance the different opinions, ideas and strengths in your team. All the time!

Mindful listening, empathy and of course patience are the main ingredients that support the above mentioned processes. Being interculturally competent is a main skill nowadays which is required in nearly all workplaces (and even at home when two different nationalities decide to live together under one roof); without it, living and working in our present world becomes difficult.

What do you think?

Resources: Check out:

  • This blog for example, very interesting articles on Germans/Americans
  • This blog for great tools and articles about culture and intercultural competence

 

 

 

Mark Twain Quote on travel (interculture)

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Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one’s lifetime.
Thanks to Mark Twain Quotes

The power of mindful e-mailing

At SymbolPeople seem to be so happy to have e-mail nowadays… it truly is much easier to communicate using e-mail than actually having to see somebody face-to-face, especially when the subject of conversation is somewhat conflictual. As we have seen in one of my earlier posts about the components of communication, 55% of the non-verbal aspects contribute to the understanding of what your counterpart is saying and 38% of the paraverbal.

So where can these aspects be found in e-mail communication, where you cannot see your discussion partner? The non-verbal aspect would actually be equivalent to character fonts, drawings, diagrams, colours… all of which are usually standardised and not available when working in a bigger company. And even in smaller ones: I don’t know anybody, who would on purpose change the font and insert images when writing to different stakeholders, do you?

The paraverbal aspect on the other hand is linked to whether you write something in bold or in italics, or whether something is underlined as well as the paragraphs and the spaces that you are leaving in your message.

This doesn’t give you a lot of room to communicate emotions or feelings and very often leads  to disastrous results when the other person understands something completely different from what you wanted to express. It is true that without facial expressions, or tone of voice, posture, gestures, it becomes difficult to actually transmit a message. What then happens is that very often, as we don’t have sufficient information available, we make things up and interpret e-mails in a way which is bound to our own experiences and our own culture. We also subsequently believe that what we are interpreting is actually the truth as mostly, there is no evidence to prove the contrary. We then end up being frustrated or frightened or simply angry on/by something which was never intended to harm us or have such an effect…if, like most people (and I count myself in it as well, although I am trying very hard to change that bad habit) you then respond back immediately, following your own interpretation, things escalate and the spiral of messages doesn’t end anymore… until, well until somebody decides that maybe a quick call or face-to-face meeting would help resolve the issue.

What can we do to avoid that situation in our daily lives? Here are some steps that you could follow[1]:

  1. Don’t react immediately to mails that annoy you, take your time!
  2. Take a deep breath
  3. Calm down (mindful walking or even a short mindful meditation could be helpful here)
  4. Write your message/response
  5. Try and put yourself into the receivers’ shoes: what day did he/she have today? How does he/she feel? What culture is he/she from? How does this person normally communicate?
  6. Read your message again and change things. If you can:
  7. Wait a couple of hours and
  8. Read the message again. Maybe you then decide that it is not worth sending it anymore or maybe you decide to
  9. Send your message

Remember: once a message is sent, you cannot get it back, even though you might be tempted to click on ‘recall’….

[1] Compare also with “Mindful e-mailing”, p. 224-226. in “Search Inside Yourself” from Chade-Meng Tan.

What the month of December can teach us about culture

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Christmas stockingMy post today has been prompted by a discussion that can be observed every year exactly at the same time: what do you have to write on your “end of the year” greeting cards, should it be” season’s greetings”? Or maybe “Merry x-mas and Happy New Year” as it used to be, or maybe even “Holiday greetings”? For English natives, this is easy as some expressions are more used in the UK, some others in the States or in Canada. But then, when you translate the wishes into other languages as good global citizens nowadays have to do, the problems begin… actually, this is not completely true. If I could choose on my own what I wanted to say, things would be more or less easy.

Once I have battled myself through diverse online dictionaries and discussion forums to find out what the most appropriate greeting for each language and country would be (yes, some countries have the same language but the greeting would slightly differ), the job is done. But normally, you cannot decide these things on your own as you have people in these countries who all want to have their say. What happens is that you get as many opinions as you ask people… funnily enough, every year, I am promising myself to simply keep the wording from last time (which I then forget in January at the latest) or to just send out cards in one language (which I then decide would be very sad being in Europe). Well, maybe I should just print out this post and take it out again next year as by now I successfully made it to the last round of card revisions for 2012….!

When looking at this particular period of time from a cultural perspective, greeting cards are actually not the only subjects of interest. Living and working in a multicultural environment, the second thing that struck me more than other years, was the fact that I am surrounded by so many different rites that I am not even aware of. For me, being German, it is normal for example to have a handmade advent calendar, an advent wreath, where every Sunday until x-mas a new candle may be lit, and, of course, to welcome Saint Nicholas to your house on the 6th of December by filling up a boot for old and young with sweets, tangerines and nuts.

Speaking with Lebanese neighbours the other day, I learned that this last practice does not exist. They have “Eid il-Burbara” on the 4th of December instead…whereas in Belgium and in the Netherlands the “Sinterklaas” even come to schools on the 6th. Nothing alike exists to my knowledge in the English-speaking and Canadian world but I am sure there are many more traditions out there that I don’t know of.

What it shows me again is that navigating through cultural waters really necessitates mindful non-judging and acceptance as we might see many things that appear “strange” or inappropriate to us. When keeping an open mind, inquiring and giving it a second thought, you will discover a true abundance of differences and cultural finesses, which are really enriching when you take the time to look. It will also give you the opportunity to meet new people and maybe even make new friends, who knows?!

What are your experiences around this time of the year? Please share them with me!

What to consider when striving towards becoming an effective communicator

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Did you know that verbal communication as such has commonly three different components or levels? These are:

  1. Paraverbal
  2. Non-verbal
  3. Verbal

In order to be an effective communicator, it is important to know what lies behind these definitions and what they mean for oral communications:

Paraverbal

These aspects of communication refer to the intonation, cadence, volume or pace of saying words. It can also be the accent, a laughter, a pause or a slight cough.

Non-verbal

Here we mean communication through gestures and touch, by using body language or posture, by facial expression and eye contact.

Verbal

Verbal aspects are what we actually say to our communication partner using language and linguistic symbols.

Following a study of Albert Mehrabian[1], an American Psychologist which has been further elaborated and refined by various other researchers subsequently, the following numbers will be interesting to you, who still have their validity and illustrate to what extent which aspect of communications is relevant to the understanding of information, thus to effectively communicating a message where your counterpart understands the meaning behind what you want to deliver:

  • The verbal aspect only accounts for 7 % (hence the content of what you are saying)
  • 38 % come from the paraverbal aspect of communication and surely not surprising:
  • 55 % from the non-verbal aspects.

Especially when looking into intercultural communications, one more level of communication can be added, as does Jürgen Bolten (1997)[2] for example. The:

Extra-verbal

With extra-verbal we mean factors inherent to a situation which can have an influence on the act of communication, i.e. the time, the situational condition, technical means, clothing, expectations.

In order to have the desired effect when communicating, negotiating, speaking etc. you need to take all of these aspects into consideration, especially the ones which are not directly linked to delivering words as shown above. This will substantially affect your relationship and the message that your counterpart receives and understands. You can imagine that if an intercultural dimension is added to this, things get even more complex!

How these different levels are having an impact on written communications and how you do all this in a mindful way will be looked at in the following posts.

Have an excellent day and thanks for reading!

[1] See for example here : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Albert_Mehrabian

[2] Jürgen Bolten (1997): Interkulturelle Wirtschaftskommunikation. In: Walter, Rolf (Editor)

Wirtschaftswissenschaften. Eine Einführung. Paderborn: Schöningh. S. 469-497.