The effects of being kind and attentive

Did you know that being kind to yourself and to others has considerable consequences? Everybody knows that responding in a mindful, curious, open, non-judgmental and kind manner in situations of interpersonal communication is a key to effectively transmitting your message and generating a fruitful dialogue.

Kindness

Photo credit: katerha via Foter.com / CC BY

But what I am sure you did not know is that a Japanese researcher was actually able to demonstrate the effects of kind words versus mean words/insults in water crystals. During many years, Masuro Emoto  took photographs of various water crystals. He then exposed them to words, pictures, emotions, even music that were either more of a positive or a negative nature. The shapes and forms of the water crystals positively influenced became even more beautiful; the ones receiving a negative treatment became ugly and even deformed.

If you think about us humans composed of 60% of water, it is incredible to imagine what effect positive words, thoughts or else can have on our system…

There apparently is an experiment that you could try out at home to see this for yourself (I still have to do it):

Fill two small glasses with a little bit of cooked rice; add some water on top of the rice. On one of the glasses, put a label on which you would write the words you would typically use when insulting/being mean to somebody (for example: “You idiot”). On the other glass, you put a label writing a nice thought, kind and pleasant words.  (For example: “You are beautiful”). Please chose your own words!

Now put the two glasses away from each other and every day, for the next three weeks you will now:

  • Insult the glass with the “mean” label
  • Very gently and kindly speak to the glass with the “kind” label.

Progressively you will perceive the effects: the glass with the “mean” label will begin to smell badly and even decompose (rot). The “kind” glass will release a pleasant odor, sometimes even somewhat sweet. The rice will still be white, whereas in the other glass the rice will become dark.

Please be sure to let me know what you found out!

Having one of these days?

Heart MeditationWhile working and feeling a bit overwhelmed today with all sorts of things happening and different emotions passing by at the same time, suddenly a mail popped up in my inbox. I get quite a lot of newsletters and blog entries on a daily basis, hence am not reading them directly normally. This one though, caught my attention as the first line that I saw read the following:

“Recognize that you are feeling disturbed, overwhelmed, depressed or some other depleting or negative emotion”.

I thought, oh, yes, ok… I acknowledge that I am feeling kind of disturbed today, maybe I should do something against that and simply send some kindness to myself instead of judging and ruminating.

So I continued reading the newsletter and immediately felt better after some moments of stillness. As we all have our good and less good days, I wanted to share this little exercise with all of you. It is called “Soft Heart Tool” and comes from heartmath.org. Hopefully it will help you too!

  1. Recognize that you are feeling disturbed, overwhelmed, depressed or some other depleting or negative emotion.
  2. Acknowledge that it is not these or other emotions that cause you to feel drained or out of sorts as much as it is the significance you give them.
  3. Find your Soft Heart attitude by intentionally feeling love, care or appreciation for a person, pet or something you truly care about. This helps take you to a soft place in your heart and increases your ability to feel care and compassion for yourself.
  4. Soak and relax any unwanted feelings in the compassion of your heart, letting the significance dissolve a little at a time. Take your time.

Jenny

 

 

Where are we heading? Thoughts on the world of today

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I have been travelling quite a lot lately by train and by plane to different European capitals and what I have seen makes me wonder where we are heading. Are machines replacing humans everywhere now? Will it be possible one day that a digital device, a robot or whatever other form of artificial intelligence gives us the warmth and the comfort as well as the balance that we need? I am sceptical I have to say, as most of the people I encounter are craving for a helping hand, a smile, a word of encouragement a well as some empathy and understanding.

Whether you go to supermarkets or airports, machines have replaced people. They scan and sort, analyse and track… people seem to be running past eachother without a word, pushing and rushing to get where they want or have to be. My question here is: do we have to run eternally? Do we need to walk past eachother without a glance? Can it be that somebody falls down and nobody is there to help him or her?

Of course I can only speak for myself but I can tell you that stopping and looking at your life from a different angle is well worth it. You might want to call it mindfulness or anything else but really being there in every single moment, reaching out to people and lending a helping hand does make a difference. A smile, a kind word, an ear even is all that it takes sometimes to make somebody’s day. Everything nowadays is oriented towards efficiency, meeting numbers, saving costs in every domain, be it in the public, non-profit or for profit sector. But I ask you: where are the people that make these systems work? Without them, everything would be empty, meaningless… we should not be hiding, pretending and fearful. We have all it takes in ourselves! It is time to step up and take your lives into your hands.

Being a mindful leader first of all to yourself but also for others is certainly a way into the right direction. Here’s wishing you a wonderful Sunday and a Happy Mother’s day, Jenny